No, I’m NOT with them…

July 25, 2007 by David.

Growing up, I never understood why my parents always reinforced the concept of surrounding myself with good friends. You know, the kind that didn’t smoke and drink, or lie, cheat and steal. Unfortunately, I made some poor friends in my teens - and though I never actively participated in the questionable activities - I gained a reputation just by the association I had with them. Looking back, it makes more sense now. I can now see my parents were right (don’t you hate that?).

Several years ago, my wife and I found out that one of our friends - someone who was one of my groomsmen in our wedding - was accused of child molestation. The mere thought of the accusation sent chills up my spine and made me want to vomit. That I had an association with this person was even more chilling. Suddenly, I didn’t want to be associated with this person at all. The mere association was damning.

Thinking about these instances - where the mere association with a negative group or person can reflect poorly on you - made me think about the term “Christian” and the association that brings with it. After reading Don Miller’s Blue Like Jazz, it dawned on me - the primary reason people avoid the Church is due to association. It’s not that Christians are child molesters or lying, cheating, thieves (some are, for sure). It’s that the mere association of the term instantly reflects on who you are, just or not just. To a world that hasn’t grown up in the church, what does that association represent?

Well, for starters, a Christian doesn’t drink - right? No alcohol for you. I know LOTS of people who find this to be a significant stumbling block. What else? Well, Christians are pro-life, pro-war conservatives who voted for Bush twice. That alone just wiped 50% of your “target” audience out. Anymore? Try this on - Christians condemn homosexuality, sex before marriage, divorce, public schools and anything involving Madonna.
I know what you’re thinking - these aren’t fair assessments. There are plenty of Christians who drink and plenty who are NOT pro-life and war-hawks. That may be, but many leaders in the Church over the last several decades have been very expressive about “the church’s” stance on these issues. Groups like the Christian Coalition have made it a point to only support candidates that reflected many of the values above. They’ve organized rallies at the foot of the capitol condemning abortion and homosexuality and Madonna (ok, I’m not sure about the last one, but it’ll happen in due time). They’ve thrown large amounts of money to candidates who reflect the “core” values of the Church. In short, leaders in the “Christian” community have set a standard for what it means to be a Christian.

The only problem with this standard, though, is that it is not the standard Jesus Himself set. Reading through the gospels, I couldn’t find where the Savior advocated one political stance over another. In fact, when it came to politics, He chose to stay out of it. His ministry here on earth was focused on one key concept - loving one another. When the pharisees tried to corner him into picking the greatest commandments (read: laws), Jesus responded with words that have echoed through the entire new testament. He gave just two commandments: Love God with all your heart, mind, body and spirit and love your neighbor as yourself. Not a single mention of homosexuality, or condemning divorce. Not one word uttered about drinking. No mention of what candidate he endorsed.

The thing is, I think Jesus would be more interested in why a young girl desires an abortion more so than making it illegal. He’d be more interested in knowing why someone feels the need to drink excessively than condemning it. He’d be more interested in who truly owns the heart of the homosexual rather than whether that person should be able to “marry” their partner. He’d be more interested in what pain has driven a couple to divorce than brow-beating them about it.

And yet, this doesn’t LOOK like the modern church. In fact, the opposite appears to be true. And that association is what drives people away. When they speak about hypocrites in the church, they’re exactly right. We claim we love God and follow Jesus, yet, we often take a stance that Christ himself never took and probably never would have. We’ve used His name for political propaganda and to push our own agendas. It’s no wonder that the Church is no longer growing. People just don’t want to be associated with it.

So, if you’re asking - I’m with Him. Always will be.

And No, I’m NOT with them…

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